Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Needs a Whistle. Sort Of.

Despite all of us here wanting to be well-informed world citizens, I think I will skip talking about the real news; too upsetting.  There are lots of extremely horrifying things going on in Japan, Libya and Bahrain (to name a few).  Thankfully, at least in Japan, people are working very hard to help the situation and save lives.

At this point, based on the really big things going on in the world, if Charlie Sheen wants back in the news as craziest f*%#&er on the planet, he will likely have to set himself on fire.  And, even then, I'm not so sure he can pull it off.   But one thing is for sure, he has ruined attention-seeking for everyone else.  Nothing any celebrity does these days is getting more than a disinterested eyebrow raise and weak little "tweet" of the whistle.

 I can sense this dog is
forlorn.  First 3 other dogs,
and now babies.  *sigh*
Mariah Carey, who by my calculations has been pregnant for 16 or 17 months, has put her dogs in therapy in anticipation of their jealousy upon the arrival of her boy/girl twins.  Yeah, yeah, whistle.  Whatever.  I have a friend who just told me that she knows someone who made a bat mitzvah for her cat (aka a cat mitzvah).  I expect my celebs to be able to out-outrageous regular people.  Apparently not so much, Mariah.  And, if there are any of you out there who are now thinking "Oh my God, a cat mitzvah, what a fun/great idea" stop right there.  No.  The answer is no.

Even Howard Stern, who thrives on finding ways to be outrageous is a big snore.  Howard was just on Jimmy Fallon and said how he's done going on late night shows.  Too much pressure and he doesn't really have anything to prove.  People were laughing, but it wasn't that funny.  Every time I have ever seen him on a talk show, he is complaining about how hard it is to be him. Yawn.  I am giving you a whistle for constantly whining.  You have made millions of dollars getting to say and do whatever you want.  What is the problem?  Big baby.  And PS, what kind of guest comes on a show and complains about coming on?

Honestly, the loudest whistle this weekend is going to one of the people who lives here with me.  He is way  more stunning than anything entertainment-related in the news.  Boy went to his Soph Hop Saturday.  My husband and I happily (well, non-begrudgingly) sold our Lewis Black tickets and stayed home so we could coordinate the 15-stop arrangements needed.  To thank us for our undying love and interest in him, I was invited to wait outside in the car while he and his date (who I picked up) went into another girl's house for group pictures (versus the ones of the two of them I had already taken).  Luckily for me, the mother at said house sent him right back outside to tell me to come in.  Ha ha Boy.  Whistle!

There was a picture of
Jimmy and Cindy kissing,
but I figured Boy would
be unamused.
After picking up Boy's date, driving to house number two, driving to dinner, picking up from dinner, driving to Rita's (water ice, for anyone who doesn't know), picking up from Rita's, driving to dance, picking up from dance and then taking date home, I was expecting maybe a hug and a thanks before he went up to bed.  I got the thanks, but no hug.  Really?  That's the best you can do?  I mean, I didn't even ask him if he kissed her.  How nice am I? 

So that's it for the Weekend Whistle Update.  As an aside, I want to add that I dread the thought of my child turning 16 in May and learning to drive because I don't want him to get killed (I did just spend all this time keeping him alive). But, after driving all over the place Saturday, I am thinking it won't be so bad when he can drive himself.  Luckily, if he is driving himself, I can be at home drinking to dull the worry because I won't have to drive anywhere.  I am not 100% sure if that is a win-win or not.


  1. I'm surprised Mariah's dogs weren't already in therapy due to the strain of the paparazzi ;)

    How fun was it to take pictures of all of the kids going to the dance? Those are moments I can't wait for, well the pictures and embarrassing my son in front of his dates as well. I'm thinking the naked butt by the tub pictures out on a coffee table will work.

  2. Dog therapy.. perfect.. I've been looking for a new product line for us. Thanks for the tip. :)

    Boy and date looked gorgeous!

    I'll be drinking in May also.. they can't seriously be almost-16 can they? How did this happen?!!

  3. It doesn't get any easier.....when babies, you have to do everything for them. but then at least, you put them down, they stayed there.


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