Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Women - Awesome or Scary? Depends Who You Ask.

Obviously, women are awesome as a rule.  Kind of goes without saying.  But, women sometimes, once in awhile, occasionally do things that don't make the rest of us look too good.  On the other hand, those same things make some men stop a second and take pause, as if thinking to themselves, "Perhaps I should consider shutting my pie hole this one time."  Unfortunately, not enough men actually ever have that thought, hence the problem.

She does not look like a very
joke-y type.  I wouldn't cut
in front of her in the school
carpool line.  Just saying.
There is a new Lorena Bobbitt in town.  Her name is Catherine Kieu Becker.  She is one scary b*#ch.  She didn't just cut off her husband's penis.  She poisoned him to make him drowsy, tied him to a bed and then cut his penis off.  For extra good measure, she put it in the garbage disposal and turned it on.  It is reported this couple was estranged and going through a divorce.  I cannot imagine what made this man go to his wife's house for dinner if they were getting divorced.  Unless of course she has always been super quiet and nice and has been quietly taking all his crap and finally decided she would get even.  She called 911 for assistance afterwards and told responding police he "deserved it."

I would say that I am at like 98% with thinking this was just the wrong thing for her to do, no matter what.  Also, at least per the article, she didn't seem all that sorry or worried about consequences.  If I was a man, this would make me worry.  This is the kind of thing where a man might shake his head and figure you can't ever really know anybody, so you should really watch your step and try to not be too big of an ass.  As we know, most men will not think this way at all.  They are not known for internalizing cautionary tales.  I would also bet money that there a quite a few women who won't cringe at all at this story and will simply shrug it off, look at their man and say "and that's what you get."

As an aside, I am betting John Bobbitt will be popping up (well maybe not all of him) soon to extend his 15 minutes of fame (past his post-op porn life) and act as a one-man support group for our victim.  Too bad there really isn't a call anymore for eunuchs.

In news that makes women look awesome in a good way versus a scary way, we have the US Women's Soccer Team.  Even if you don't follow soccer  (I do not) this is one of those sports things where you should try to sort of keep up so you don't look clueless when everyone else is talking about it.  Don't worry how I know this will happen, I just do.  The US team won on Sunday 3-2 against Brazil (tied it at the very end of the game and won in penalty kicks).  I swear the Party told me this was the finals.  He said he didn't and that I think everything is the finals.  False.  You can imagine how surprised I was to hear they were playing again today.  He shook his head at me when I mentioned my confusion.  Anyhoo, they won against France 3-1.  NOW they will go to the finals.

You should really see it up
close and sweaty.
Beyond "ew".
In other sports (non-woman related) news that you should know, baseball is on a break.  During their break, they played the All-Star Game yesterday.  The National League won for the second year in a row and will therefore have home field advantage for the World Series.  I only watched the last couple innings, so I don't know if there is any important game news you should have, but just this will keep you from being mocked.  Oh - you could make yourself seem in-the-know by mentioning Giant's pitcher Brian Wilson, who closed the game for the National League.  You can mention his "this is what I would look like if I was a mental patient" beard that he has been growing for a full year and dyes black.  It's awful.  Awful.

I couldn't even find a
picture of an "adult"
refusing to even
TRY vegetables.

Unrelated to women or sports, I have an update for you from my last post about lying creatively encouraging your children to do things your way.  After The Party read the post, all he had to say was that I better not ever try to feed him/trick him into eating cauliflower.  Ever.  It's the most awful vegetable in both taste and texture.  I told him that strong of a statement only encouraged me to try to come up with a recipe with cauliflower to trick him.  He also admitted that even if he liked such a recipe he would totally change his mind  and insist he didn't if he knew cauliflower was in it.  Not that I would ever cut off any of his body parts, but you can start to see how that sort of thing happens, right?


  1. You are one sick cookie. (And I mean this in the nicest possible way, being your mother and all.)

    Also, that woman didn't HAVE to call 911, so she gets points for that. AND, she had to trash the mattress and bedding. I guess she can't claim it on insurance.

    In other news, your Mom Mom gave me a recipe from Weight Watchers a million years ago for cauliflower latkes. I went through a latke period for a while until I got tired of them. I guess the Party won't slide for that. They didn't actually look like potato latkes. I guess they didn't taste so much like them either.
    Have you considered cauliflower Margaritas?

  2. Puree some cauliflower in mashed potatoes and no one will ever know.
    Trust me. ;)

    Also, this Becker woman was obviously a psycho, which may or may not be why the man was divorcing her in the first place. What she did was AWFUL. Even if the guy was the giantest ahole on the face of the planet, this type of action makes HUMANITY look bad, not just women.

  3. ...and that's what you get.

    Okay, *maybe* she went a little overboard. But now women all over the world can just -look- at their husband/boyfriend and go, "Mmm Hmm" and they will shut up and rethink the last thing they said.

  4. Cauliflower can be made to look and taste like rice. Look on the internet for the receipe.

  5. Agree with the cauliflower mashed potatoes. Try it!

    And I also agree with TMM - "mmmm hmmm"....


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