Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Trust Me, It's off the Record

She wouldn't let me take
her picture, so what choice
did I have but to post this?
Apparently, my blogging makes some people nervous.  Not exactly sure why.  I don't write anything that would embarrass anyone (except perhaps myself).  I recently had dinner with my cousin who kept saying "You aren't going to write about this on your blog are you?"  And she wouldn't let me take her picture.  I mean unless you are a politician or famous person who is doing something disgusting or stupid, you're safe.  Mostly.

I wrote on Facebook that my husband and son think my blog is biased against men and children.  That is total bullshit.  I am merely chronicling my life with these people.  Can I help it if when the truth is revealed it sometimes shows that men and children are troublesome non-cooperators?  No I cannot.  I simply try to offer a humorous and light-hearted view of life.  I am helping people to save thousands of dollars in therapy bills.  You're welcome.

Apparently, you CAN
get in trouble for
posting some things.
I will say, there are times when I would like to blog about people or situations (you didn't hear it here, but PTA on occasion)  but there is no way to do it without it being obvious about whom or what I am referring.  As mentioned before, I am a ray of sunshine and therefore would never do that.  I am forced to talk privately  about these things.  I mean if you can't trust your friends to talk privately behind your back instead of in public, who can you trust?

Moving on...guess what!!!!  I finally remembered what my little note about sandwiches meant!  There was a product in Pottery Barn Kids to cut sandwiches into cool shapes.  Cool until I realized that it cuts out about a third of the sandwich.  And, in the picture, they don't show the rest of the sandwich in the lunchbox anywhere.  Further, said lunchbox (a bento box no less) looks cool, but that would have lasted about a week with my kids before it was lost or broken or irreversibly smelly.  Oh yeah, and the other thing, you have to have the totally right shape bread for the sandwich cutter to work anyway.  If I was the sort to name names and talk about people, I would totally tell you which of the people at our school would use these products.

You can find this and other similar products
 in the Alpha Moms Rule The World catalog.

I found something that was surprisingly interesting.  Lady Gaga, who I normally can take or leave, commented on Howard Stern's show that girls/women should wait until their mid-twenties to have sex.  Very surprising coming from her, given her image.  The article then reports Dr. Laura Berman's (women's sexual health expert) response to that topic.  What the article is missing, however, is what Howard Stern had to say about that.  I can't imagine he just said "OMG Lady Gaga, I think you are so right."  I will say though, as a parent, I would be glad to have my daughter hear that Lady Gaga thinks being and looking and sexy is a whole different thing from having sex.  As much as I hate to, I'm going to have to give LG some love and maybe a few air kisses.

In today's Crazy News, an Illinois inmate is demanding 50 billion dollars and his own country for being wrongly arrested and having his civil rights repeatedly violated.  He has electronically filed suit.  I should mention that he was arrested originally for biting a police officer while he was being held in a mental health facility.  He has, on more than one occasion, been found incompetent to stand trial for an assortment of things.  Why is he in jail and not a Home for the Terminally Bonkers?  

If you squint,  Sarah
looks like Czarina
Alexandra.  And I
bet she already speaks
Russian too!

I mean let's get serious here, when the United States finally outlawed slavery, I don't recall the thousands and thousands of people whose rights were actually violated getting any money or countries, so right there it tells you this guy doesn't really have a grip on reality.  And further, he is willing to accept Alaska as the land he can turn into his own country.  I don't think Sarah is gonna for that at all.  No way she gives up her front porch view of Russia for some crazy guy.  Unless...follow along with me now...maybe he will make Sarah a czar or something.  That is way better than president and the new country doesn't have any history she has to remember, so it's perfect!!


  1. I think you may have gone too far in considering Sarah for czarhood ;)

  2. If she's a czar of another country - she's not our problem. Who's she gonna bother all the way over there in New Alaska?

    And the Mental Patient head of the country isn't going to be bothered by her at all. He will be ordering around his imaginary subjects. :)

  3. THANK YOU for pointing out the whole sandwich cutting out problem. I would never waste half a sandwich just to entice my kid to eat it. He will eat either eat his regular bread-shaped sandwich because he is hungry, or he will not eat it and he will starve. I'm ok with either of those options.

  4. I like the idea of sandwiches in different shapes.
    But why would I spent $$$ if I can just use a knife and make a star or heart out if it myself?
    And that while wasting a lot less bread...


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