Troubling

Okay, so here is what's troubling me today.

It's extremely beautiful

Wait, before I go any further, I have to tell those of you who don't know me that I have a whistle.  What?  Yes, a whistle.  Like a referee whistle, only better.  It's better because my friend, knowing I wanted one, gave me one on a beautiful beaded and sparkly necklace, AND, she bedazzled the actual whistle.


I decided a couple of weeks ago that people were annoying me.  People in my house.  People out in public.  What better way to deal with this than just start blowing a whistle at someone who is being rude or loud or not listening or fresh.  My husband protested the idea vehemently and said there was no way anyone would agree with me.  Fast forward -I have a beautiful beaded whistle.  And lots of friends who are considering getting their own.


I don't even actually have to blow the whistle, sometimes I just pretend to hold a whistle to my mouth and pretend to blow.  Husband and children know it's a laugh riot but refuse to acknowledge.


Anyhoo, there are several things going on that warrant people getting a whistle blown at them.


First is my children.  They are being so annoying today I can't even stand it.  If my 15 year old son gives me one more tip on parenting his 13 year old sister, you are gonna hear the whistle from there.  And if the girl child doesn't keep her death glare to herself...I think her face may actually freeze that way and it would serve her right.


Please be sure to look in the comment section below where I am sure my mother will chime in what good children they are when they are with her.  Whistle.

your hair looks stupid too

Next - Charlie Sheen.  WTF?  Hearing about him and strippers or hookers or would-be models getting into some sort of problem isn't even news anymore.  Apparently, he is now in the hospital because his hernia (??) was acting up.  He had to be rushed there in the middle of his little party.  Whistle.  And smack.


And you know what?  A big whistle to all these women he's always with.  Based on the current information we have on Chuck, what makes you think hanging with him is a good plan?  It never ends well and no one has gotten famous for being involved in his escapades.  It's not a good career move.


I bet if Conchata Ferrell and Jon Cryer could get Charlie alone in a room they would beat the snot out of him.  They wouldn't whistle at him, but I bet they'd have a place they'd like to shove the whistle.


So, done with Charlie.  Onto Boy George.  What?  Yes, Boy George.

Just Say No!

Get your 2012 calendars out because Boy George, now free from prison, has announced that Culture Club is reuniting and gearing up for a world tour in 2012.  Whistle.


I wasn't even aware they had "broken up."  I thought they just stopped performing because no one wanted to see them anymore.  And because Boy George was so often busy cleaning streets as part of his work release.


And, to wrap it up, we are gonna have to give a big whistle to President Mubarak of Egypt.  Dude, things are not going well for you.  In the past there have been like 6 assassination attempts with your name on them.  That is a message.  Maybe try giving the democracy thing a whirl.  People are not big fans of oppression.  Just saying.


You should all be aware that because we discussed current events this counts as a serious and meaningful adult conversation.  You should feel free to act superior to your friends and family for the remainder of the day.